Quote

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

George Carlin

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
Prophet
Atheist
Organization
Atheism
Religion

More quotes by George Carlin

Image
The dividend I get [from my compulsion] is the freedom to be totally disorderly in my dreamworld.
George Carlin
Image
A pear is a failed apple.
George Carlin
Image
Do you know the nicest thing about looking at pictures of a 1950's baseball park? The only people wearing baseball caps are the players.
George Carlin
Image
But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
George Carlin
Image
Hey! Who stole my collection of used bandages?! And they also got away with my nude pictures of Ernest Borgnine!
George Carlin
Image
Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain, For strip-mined mountain's majesty above the asphalt plain. America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea.
George Carlin
Image
The base of evil in the world is religion of any kind
George Carlin
Image
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
George Carlin
Image
One philosopher has rightly said that property is theft. But I'd like to use my future ownership of property to give something back.
George Carlin
Image
Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
George Carlin
Image
The planet isn't going anywhere. We are.
George Carlin
Image
I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.
George Carlin
Image
Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin' ready to hang himself.
George Carlin
Image
In Hawaii they say, aloha. That's a nice one, It means both hello and good-bye Which just goes to show, if you spend enough time in the sun you don't know whether you're coming or going.
George Carlin
Image
Don't confuse my point of view with cynicism. The real cynics are the ones who tell you that everything's gonna be all right.
George Carlin
Image
Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?
George Carlin
Image
It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
George Carlin
Image
They [the Reagan Administration] want to put street criminals in jail to make life safer for the business criminals. They're against street crime, providing that street isn't Wall Street.
George Carlin
Image
Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
George Carlin
Image
First I was a mimic. Practically from the moment I began talking, I did impersonations of the people in my neighborhood - the storekeepers, the policemen, my teachers.
George Carlin