Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
George Carlin
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
George Carlin
Age: 71 †
Born: 1937
Born: May 12
Died: 2008
Died: June 22
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Manufacturer
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
New York City
New York
George Denis Patrick Carlin
True
Perception
Littles
Species
Little
Perspective
Humor
Sleet
Alone
Aimed
Rather
Settled
Funny
Genuine
Universe
Lows
More quotes by George Carlin
Beethoven was so hard of hearing, he thought he was a painter.
George Carlin
Sometimes, when I was really loaded, I'd sit on the floor and sort out every nut and bolt in the house. It was just sheer insanity. And often there'd be speed in the cut, so I was a speed freak, too.
George Carlin
I profess no belief in God, which by definition is true, especially if we take the accepted definition of God. But to be an atheist is to also have a belief, and have a system, and I don't know that I like that either.
George Carlin
Why do they bother saying raw sewage? Do some people actually cook that stuff?
George Carlin
The base of evil in the world is religion of any kind
George Carlin
I think I am, therefore, I am... I think.
George Carlin
Personally, when it comes to rights, I think one of two things is true. I think either we have unlimited rights, or we have no rights at all. Personally I lean towards unlimited rights, I feel for instance I have the right to do anything I please, BUT! If I do something you don't like I think you have the right to kill me.
George Carlin
It's harder to be funny from the position of power.
George Carlin
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
George Carlin
I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen.
George Carlin
If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
George Carlin
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
George Carlin
The secret of success is doing something you love, doing it well and being recognized for it
George Carlin
Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days I’ve stayed alive.
George Carlin
No one who has had Taps played for them has ever been able to hear it.
George Carlin
Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.
George Carlin
The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. God has a three-day weekend.
George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
George Carlin
Give now. Somewhere, someone feels crappy. You can help.
George Carlin
The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election
George Carlin
