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I drink coffee with my right hand, and I smoke with my left. But I talk with both hands.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Talk
Left
Hands
Right
Smoke
Coffee
Drink
Hand

More quotes by George Burns

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None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.
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You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
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Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.
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It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
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When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.
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As long as you're working, you stay young.
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How can I die? I'm booked.
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When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then and I'm labeled senile.
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The heart is a temple wherein all truth resides.
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Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.
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Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
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There are many ways to die in bed, but the best way is not alone.
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It's better to be happy doing something you love, even if you don't find success right away.
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I use the cigar for timing purposes. If I tell a joke, I smoke as long as they laugh and when they stop laughing I take the cigar out of my mouth and start my next joke.
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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
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Age to me means nothing. I can't get old I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working, you stay young. When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.
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When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.
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If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.
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A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
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Sex after 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. Even putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
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