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I'd rather be a flop at show business than to be a success at something I didn't like.
George Burns
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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Didn
Something
Like
Flop
Rather
Show
Success
Business
Shows
More quotes by George Burns
I never go jogging, it makes me spill my martini.
George Burns
It's better to be happy doing something you love, even if you don't find success right away.
George Burns
In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
George Burns
Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.
George Burns
I drink coffee with my right hand, and I smoke with my left. But I talk with both hands.
George Burns
When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights.
George Burns
Say Goodnight Gracie.
George Burns
Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.
George Burns
If you were married to Marilyn Monroe, you'd cheat with some ugly girl.
George Burns
In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
George Burns
You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.
George Burns
I've been a straight man for so many years that from force of habit I repeat everything. I went out fishing with a fellow the other day and he fell overboard. He yelled, Help! Help! Help! so I said, Help? Help? Help? And while I was waiting for him to get his laugh, he drowned.
George Burns
This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
George Burns
I'd rather be over the hill than under it.
George Burns
Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
George Burns
I'm onstage for an hour.I do an hour of stand-up. Actually, I do 10 minutes standing up and 50 minutes sitting in a chair. Oh, occasionally, I stand up again to do a dance or put over a song. But mostly I sit down. A great invention, sitting down.
George Burns
When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.
George Burns
None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.
George Burns
Let me get one thing straight I'm not an authority on sex, I'm more of a fan. I think sex is nice no family should be without it. Of course, there are other things that are just as important as sex, like uh . . . like uh . . . like . . . uh . . . well, I'll think of it later.
George Burns
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.
George Burns
