Quote

Sex after 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. Even putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Even
Holder
Trying
Cigar
Like
Rope
Thrill
Pool
Shoot
Putting
Sex

More quotes by George Burns

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Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.
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I'm onstage for an hour.I do an hour of stand-up. Actually, I do 10 minutes standing up and 50 minutes sitting in a chair. Oh, occasionally, I stand up again to do a dance or put over a song. But mostly I sit down. A great invention, sitting down.
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Joy is obtaining a big, loving, caring shut-knit household in yet another town.
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Let me get one thing straight I'm not an authority on sex, I'm more of a fan. I think sex is nice no family should be without it. Of course, there are other things that are just as important as sex, like uh . . . like uh . . . like . . . uh . . . well, I'll think of it later.
George Burns
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I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.
George Burns
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There are two kinds of cruises - pleasure and with children.
George Burns
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I don't care what you do for a living. If you love it, you are a success.
George Burns
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What actresses do today when they appear on the screen is what they did once upon a time for getting to appear on the screen.
George Burns
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It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.
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Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
George Burns
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I can't afford to die I'd lose too much money.
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Be quick to learn and wise to know.
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When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights.
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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
George Burns
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When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.
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Say Goodnight Gracie.
George Burns
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In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
George Burns
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When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.
George Burns
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Tennis is a young man's game. Until you're 25, you can play singles. From 25 to 35, you should play doubles. I won't tell you exactly how old I am, but when I played, there were 28 men on the court - just on my side of the net.
George Burns
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She didn't need to go to acting school to learn that the essence of acting is to act like you're not acting.
George Burns