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None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Another
Humorous
Kids
None
Around
Lucky
Way
Name
Time
Middle
Names
Funny
Mother
Naming

More quotes by George Burns

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My major contribution to the format was to suggest that I be able to step out of the plot and speak directly to the audience, and then be able to go right back into the action. That was an original idea of mine I know it was because I originally stole it from Thornton Wilder's play Our Town.
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I never go jogging, it makes me spill my martini.
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It's no surprise that things are so screwed up: everyone that knows how to run a government is either driving taxicabs or cutting hair.
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Sex after 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. Even putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
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This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
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Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.
George Burns
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She didn't need to go to acting school to learn that the essence of acting is to act like you're not acting.
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I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.
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Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.
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Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
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I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.
George Burns
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Critics are eunuchs at a gang bang.
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I did go to school - my kind of school. When I was a kid I went out ... and you meet people. You talk to them. Anybody says something that makes sense, it stays with you, rubs off on you. That kind of school.
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As long as you're working, you stay young.
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Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.
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When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.
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I'd rather be over the hill than under it.
George Burns
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In show business the key word is honesty. Once you've learned to fake that, the rest is easy.
George Burns
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With the collapse of vaudeville new talent has no place to stink.
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At my age flowers scare me.
George Burns