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I look better, feel better, make love better and I'll tell you something else....I never lied better.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Never
Else
Love
Better
Look
Looks
Feel
Feels
Something
Lied
Make
Tell

More quotes by George Burns

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Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
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I'd rather be over the hill than under it.
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The heart is a temple wherein all truth resides.
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A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
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In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
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It's better to be happy doing something you love, even if you don't find success right away.
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Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.
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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
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There are many ways to die in bed, but the best way is not alone.
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You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.
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Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.
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I did go to school - my kind of school. When I was a kid I went out ... and you meet people. You talk to them. Anybody says something that makes sense, it stays with you, rubs off on you. That kind of school.
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Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.
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It's no surprise that things are so screwed up: everyone that knows how to run a government is either driving taxicabs or cutting hair.
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It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
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I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
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I was brought up to respect my elders, so now I don't have to respect anybody.
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I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.
George Burns
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I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.
George Burns
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Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.
George Burns