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Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Lunch
Sex
Fun
Eighty
Ninety

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In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
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I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.
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Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.
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None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.
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How did I ever get sick? I've already had everything.
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I don't care what you do for a living. If you love it, you are a success.
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What actresses do today when they appear on the screen is what they did once upon a time for getting to appear on the screen.
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Say Goodnight Gracie.
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There's an old saying, 'Life begins at forty.' That's silly. Life begins every morning you wake up.
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It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.
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You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
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Since I've made it to 87 so far, obviously my two kids and my seven grandchildren haven't been too hard on me. On the other hand, the fact that I have an unlisted phone number and move a lot might have something to do with it.
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If I paid $3 or $4 for a cigar, first I'd sleep with it.
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I'm onstage for an hour.I do an hour of stand-up. Actually, I do 10 minutes standing up and 50 minutes sitting in a chair. Oh, occasionally, I stand up again to do a dance or put over a song. But mostly I sit down. A great invention, sitting down.
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I get a standing ovation just standing
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I drink coffee with my right hand, and I smoke with my left. But I talk with both hands.
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She didn't need to go to acting school to learn that the essence of acting is to act like you're not acting.
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When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.
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Age to me means nothing. I can't get old I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working, you stay young. When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.
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Life's but a day at most.
George Burns