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Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Sex
Fun
Eighty
Ninety
Lunch

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Be quick to learn and wise to know.
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I'd rather be a flop at show business than to be a success at something I didn't like.
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Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.
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I can't afford to die I'd lose too much money.
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Just because you're old that doesn't mean you're more forgetful. The same people whose names I can't remember now I couldn't remember fifty years ago. . .
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In show business the key word is honesty. Once you've learned to fake that, the rest is easy.
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The heart is a temple wherein all truth resides.
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Joy is obtaining a big, loving, caring shut-knit household in yet another town.
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I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.
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And God said 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan.'
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I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.
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Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.
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Age to me means nothing. I can't get old I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working, you stay young. When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.
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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
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At my age flowers scare me.
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Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
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With the collapse of vaudeville new talent has no place to stink.
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None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.
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This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
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When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.
George Burns