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I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Drunk
Drinking
Drink
Funny
Fall
Problem

More quotes by George Burns

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Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left
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Be sure to wear a good cologne, a nice aftershave lotion, and a strong underarm deodorant. And it might be a good idea to wear some clothes, too.
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I'd rather be over the hill than under it.
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What actresses do today when they appear on the screen is what they did once upon a time for getting to appear on the screen.
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A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
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I get a standing ovation just standing
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I use the cigar for timing purposes. If I tell a joke, I smoke as long as they laugh and when they stop laughing I take the cigar out of my mouth and start my next joke.
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How can I die? I'm booked.
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Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!
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There are many ways to die in bed, but the best way is not alone.
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Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
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Bridge is a game that separates the men from the boys. It also separates husbands and wives.
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In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
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There's an old saying, 'Life begins at forty.' That's silly. Life begins every morning you wake up.
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The heart is a temple wherein all truth resides.
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When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then and I'm labeled senile.
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When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.
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When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.
George Burns
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I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.
George Burns
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When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, 'No ... he's dead.'
George Burns