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It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Anywhere
Age
Good
Aging

More quotes by George Burns

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When I wasn't working, I put the blame directly where it belonged - I blamed my agent. When I didn't have an agent, I spent time looking for a new agent so I would have somebody to blame.
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When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.
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How can I die? I'm booked.
George Burns
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I look better, feel better, make love better and I'll tell you something else....I never lied better.
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I've been a straight man for so many years that from force of habit I repeat everything. I went out fishing with a fellow the other day and he fell overboard. He yelled, Help! Help! Help! so I said, Help? Help? Help? And while I was waiting for him to get his laugh, he drowned.
George Burns
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I did go to school - my kind of school. When I was a kid I went out ... and you meet people. You talk to them. Anybody says something that makes sense, it stays with you, rubs off on you. That kind of school.
George Burns
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If you stay in the business long enough and get to be old enough, you get to be new again.
George Burns
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Joy is obtaining a big, loving, caring shut-knit household in yet another town.
George Burns
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I never go jogging, it makes me spill my martini.
George Burns
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In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
George Burns
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A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
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In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
George Burns
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I'd rather be over the hill than under it.
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I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.
George Burns
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Life's but a day at most.
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This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
George Burns
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Let me get one thing straight I'm not an authority on sex, I'm more of a fan. I think sex is nice no family should be without it. Of course, there are other things that are just as important as sex, like uh . . . like uh . . . like . . . uh . . . well, I'll think of it later.
George Burns
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I'd rather be a flop at show business than to be a success at something I didn't like.
George Burns
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At my age flowers scare me.
George Burns
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When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights.
George Burns