Quote

Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.

George Burns

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Laughing
Makes
Someone
Think
Thinking
Humorist
Humorists
Comedian
Laugh

More quotes by George Burns

Image
And God said 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan.'
George Burns
Image
Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.
George Burns
Image
Let me get one thing straight I'm not an authority on sex, I'm more of a fan. I think sex is nice no family should be without it. Of course, there are other things that are just as important as sex, like uh . . . like uh . . . like . . . uh . . . well, I'll think of it later.
George Burns
Image
I drink coffee with my right hand, and I smoke with my left. But I talk with both hands.
George Burns
Image
I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it.
George Burns
Image
You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
George Burns
Image
When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights.
George Burns
Image
I get a standing ovation just standing
George Burns
Image
Be quick to learn and wise to know.
George Burns
Image
I've been a straight man for so many years that from force of habit I repeat everything. I went out fishing with a fellow the other day and he fell overboard. He yelled, Help! Help! Help! so I said, Help? Help? Help? And while I was waiting for him to get his laugh, he drowned.
George Burns
Image
I'm onstage for an hour.I do an hour of stand-up. Actually, I do 10 minutes standing up and 50 minutes sitting in a chair. Oh, occasionally, I stand up again to do a dance or put over a song. But mostly I sit down. A great invention, sitting down.
George Burns
Image
Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.
George Burns
Image
Much later in life, though, Gracie made a major contribution to the opera world. She stayed out of it.
George Burns
Image
As long as you're working, you stay young.
George Burns
Image
There's an old saying, 'Life begins at forty.' That's silly. Life begins every morning you wake up.
George Burns
Image
None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.
George Burns
Image
I never go jogging, it makes me spill my martini.
George Burns
Image
In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
George Burns
Image
I look better, feel better, make love better and I'll tell you something else....I never lied better.
George Burns
Image
Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!
George Burns