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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
George Burns
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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Names
Forget
Zipper
Faces
Zippers
Funny
Birthday
Next
Pull
Firsts
Finally
First
Humor
Comedy
More quotes by George Burns
In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
George Burns
Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.
George Burns
Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
George Burns
Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
George Burns
There are two kinds of cruises - pleasure and with children.
George Burns
The heart is a temple wherein all truth resides.
George Burns
I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.
George Burns
I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
George Burns
Sex after 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. Even putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
George Burns
How did I ever get sick? I've already had everything.
George Burns
I don't care what you do for a living. If you love it, you are a success.
George Burns
Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.
George Burns
Say Goodnight Gracie.
George Burns
My major contribution to the format was to suggest that I be able to step out of the plot and speak directly to the audience, and then be able to go right back into the action. That was an original idea of mine I know it was because I originally stole it from Thornton Wilder's play Our Town.
George Burns
Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.
George Burns
When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.
George Burns
There are many ways to die in bed, but the best way is not alone.
George Burns
In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
George Burns
You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.
George Burns
I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.
George Burns