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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
George Burns
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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Make
Bed
Life
Unless
Stay
Funny
Business
Inspirational
Money
Inaction
Work
Humorous
More quotes by George Burns
When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.
George Burns
There's an old saying, 'Life begins at forty.' That's silly. Life begins every morning you wake up.
George Burns
Life's but a day at most.
George Burns
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.
George Burns
Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.
George Burns
When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, 'No ... he's dead.'
George Burns
Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!
George Burns
Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.
George Burns
This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
George Burns
How did I ever get sick? I've already had everything.
George Burns
Joy is obtaining a big, loving, caring shut-knit household in yet another town.
George Burns
Let me get one thing straight I'm not an authority on sex, I'm more of a fan. I think sex is nice no family should be without it. Of course, there are other things that are just as important as sex, like uh . . . like uh . . . like . . . uh . . . well, I'll think of it later.
George Burns
It's better to be happy doing something you love, even if you don't find success right away.
George Burns
When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights.
George Burns
If I paid $3 or $4 for a cigar, first I'd sleep with it.
George Burns
You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
George Burns
Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left
George Burns
A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
George Burns
Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.
George Burns
In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.
George Burns
