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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

George Burns

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George Burns
Age: 100 †
Born: 1896
Born: January 20
Died: 1996
Died: March 9
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Street Artist
Television Actor
Writer
New York City
New York
Nathan Birnbaum
George N. Burns
Stay
Funny
Business
Inspirational
Money
Inaction
Work
Humorous
Make
Bed
Life
Unless

More quotes by George Burns

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When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, 'No ... he's dead.'
George Burns
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Since I've made it to 87 so far, obviously my two kids and my seven grandchildren haven't been too hard on me. On the other hand, the fact that I have an unlisted phone number and move a lot might have something to do with it.
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Tennis is a young man's game. Until you're 25, you can play singles. From 25 to 35, you should play doubles. I won't tell you exactly how old I am, but when I played, there were 28 men on the court - just on my side of the net.
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My major contribution to the format was to suggest that I be able to step out of the plot and speak directly to the audience, and then be able to go right back into the action. That was an original idea of mine I know it was because I originally stole it from Thornton Wilder's play Our Town.
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I never go jogging, it makes me spill my martini.
George Burns
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A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.
George Burns
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I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
George Burns
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I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.
George Burns
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I can't afford to die I'd lose too much money.
George Burns
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None of us kids had a middle name. We were lucky we had any name at all. By the time my mother got around to naming one, there was another on the way.
George Burns
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She didn't need to go to acting school to learn that the essence of acting is to act like you're not acting.
George Burns
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If I paid $3 or $4 for a cigar, first I'd sleep with it.
George Burns
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It's better to be happy doing something you love, even if you don't find success right away.
George Burns
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Be quick to learn and wise to know.
George Burns
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There are many ways to die in bed, but the best way is not alone.
George Burns
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There are two kinds of cruises - pleasure and with children.
George Burns
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Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.
George Burns
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Age to me means nothing. I can't get old I'm working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you're working, you stay young. When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.
George Burns
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In those days the best painkiller was ice it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it.
George Burns
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Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.
George Burns