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Then I smell the sweat on him, a clean musky scent that I'd bottle and wear as perfume if I could.
Gayle Forman
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Gayle Forman
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 5
Writer
LA
California
Perfume
Bottle
Scent
Bottles
Sweat
Smell
Wear
Clean
Musky
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The politeness was painful. I wanted to push through it, to return to the glow of the night of the concert, but I was unsure of how to get back there.
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He looks at one of the pictures for a long time. Then he looks at me. I'll keep you up here. He taps his temple. Where you can't get lost.
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Or maybe it's not a miracle. Maybe this is just life. When you open yourself up to it. When you put yourself in the path of it. When you say yes.
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My first impulse is not to grab her or kiss her or yell at her. I simple want to touch her cheek, still flushed from the night's performance. I want to cut through the space that separates us, measured in feet-not miles, not continents, not years-and to take a callused finger to her face.
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I'm also starting to wonder something else. If maybe the point of this crazy quest I'm on wasn't to help me find Willem. Maybe it was to help me find someone else entirely.
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I think everything is happening all the time, but if you don't put yourself in the path of it, you miss it. When you travel, you put yourself out there. It's not always great. Sometimes it's terrible. But other times ... [...] It's not so bad.
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Something given, something taken away. Does it always have to work like that?
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And that's when I understand that I have been stained. Whether I'm still in love with him, whether he was ever in love with me, and no matter who he's in love with now, Willem changed my life. He showed me how to get lost, and then I showed myself how to get found.
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Travelling is like a talent, like whistling or dancing. And some people have it.
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She left for Juilliard the day after Labor Day. I drove her to the airport. She kissed me good-bye. She told me that she loved me more than life itself. Then she stepped through security. She never came back.
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Bribes are the glue that's kept teenagers and parents connected for generations
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Willem tsk-tsks. You Americans are so violent. I'm Dutch. The worst I will do is run her over with a bicycle.
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