Quote

We all desperately need love. If a spouse in a difficult marriage will learn the love language of that spouse, and they will, with the help of God, consistently speak their love language no matter how they are treated.

Gary Chapman

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Gary Chapman
Age: 86
Born: 1938
Born: January 10
Author
Radio Personality
Writer
Winston-Salem
North Carolina
Gary Demonte Chapman
Speak
Spouse
Helping
Consistently
Matter
Treated
Need
Marriage
Needs
Help
Love
Learn
Language
Difficult
Desperately

More quotes by Gary Chapman

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If we are to develop an intimate relationship, we need to know each other's desires. If we wish to love each other, we need to know what the other person wants.
Gary Chapman
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I think another [myth] is that some marriages are just hopeless. This is a common thing I hear from people, Well, I just think there are some marriages that are hopeless, Dr. Chapman, don't you agree with that? I say I understand the feeling, but the fact is that there are no marriages that are hopeless.
Gary Chapman
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Real love - This kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth.
Gary Chapman
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On the other hand, if I walk in the house, I don't even bother to find her, I just walk in the den and flip on the TV, get myself something to drink, sit down, start unwinding, I have influenced my wife in a very negative way.
Gary Chapman
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The pattern often has been entrenched since childhood... [abusive people] don't think that there is anything wrong with them because that is the way they were brought up in their family.
Gary Chapman
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Isolation is devastating to the human psyche.
Gary Chapman
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I hope the reader's sense that I am deeply empathetic with the pain of being in a desperate marriage, but I also believe that the person who is married to the abuser or the alcoholic or whomever has the greatest potential for helping them.
Gary Chapman
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My attitude affects my actions. So, if I have a negative attitude about it, then it is going to show up in the way I respond, but if I have a positive attitude, then I start looking for the things I can do that will make my life better and make the lives of people around me better.
Gary Chapman
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..there is hope. That's the marvelous thing about being human. We can change our future. We need not be enslaved by the experiences of the past. We can learn to love even when we have not received love.
Gary Chapman
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One [reality] is that I am responsible for my attitude. I can be in prison, and I happen to get a chance to go outside. I can look at the mud, or I can look at the stars. I am the one who decides which way to look. That is true for every one of us.
Gary Chapman
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Sex is the joining of two bodies love is the joining of two souls.
Gary Chapman
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Life's deepest meaning is not found in accomplishments , but in relationships
Gary Chapman
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This book [Desperate Marriages ] is really a book on how to be a positive change agent in a very, very difficult marriage. I am not promising that all individuals will be responsive to the approach I take, but I do believe that many marriages could be saved... could be healed. That is my hope.
Gary Chapman
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Requests give direction to love, but demands stop the flow of love.
Gary Chapman
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Love is a choice you make everyday.
Gary Chapman
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Every single day in a marriage, we influence each other. It is a matter of am I going to have a positive influence or a negative influence?
Gary Chapman
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At the heart of mankind's existence is the desire to be intimate and to be loved by another. Marriage is designed to meet that need for intimacy and love.
Gary Chapman
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We fail to reckon with the reality of human nature. By nature,we are egocentric. Our world revolves around us. None of us is totally altruistic.
Gary Chapman
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Love doesn't erase the past, but it makes the future different.
Gary Chapman
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If you grew up in a dysfunctional family, then there is really no hope for you to have a good relationship. That is another myth that we have to throw off, so that we can get into what I call Reality.
Gary Chapman