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We all desperately need love. If a spouse in a difficult marriage will learn the love language of that spouse, and they will, with the help of God, consistently speak their love language no matter how they are treated.
Gary Chapman
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Gary Chapman
Age: 86
Born: 1938
Born: January 10
Author
Radio Personality
Writer
Winston-Salem
North Carolina
Gary Demonte Chapman
Love
Learn
Language
Difficult
Desperately
Speak
Spouse
Helping
Consistently
Matter
Treated
Need
Marriage
Needs
Help
More quotes by Gary Chapman
Requests give direction to love, but demands stop the flow of love.
Gary Chapman
Remember that your ultimate goal is for your children to grow up secure in your love, strong in their faith, and with sound character.
Gary Chapman
Real love - This kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth.
Gary Chapman
We can certainly see contemporary examples of people who radically change. As long you believe your spouse will never change and you keep telling yourself that, then you live with no hope. But if you understand that that's a myth, then you open up the door to hope.
Gary Chapman
This book [Desperate Marriages ] is really a book on how to be a positive change agent in a very, very difficult marriage. I am not promising that all individuals will be responsive to the approach I take, but I do believe that many marriages could be saved... could be healed. That is my hope.
Gary Chapman
Don't be a victim of the urgent. In the long run, much of what seems so pressing right now won't even matter. What you do with your children will matter forever.
Gary Chapman
..there is hope. That's the marvelous thing about being human. We can change our future. We need not be enslaved by the experiences of the past. We can learn to love even when we have not received love.
Gary Chapman
Ask yourself: Does the action I am considering have any potential for dealing with the wrong and helping the relationship? And is it best for the person at whom I am angry? The two most constructive options are either to confront the person in a helpful way, or to consciously decide to overlook the matter.
Gary Chapman
Every single day in a marriage, we influence each other. It is a matter of am I going to have a positive influence or a negative influence?
Gary Chapman
Our spouse will usually interpret our message based on our tone of voice, not the words we use.
Gary Chapman
When people respond too quickly, they often respond to the wrong issue. Listening helps us focus on the heart of the conflict. When we listen, understand, and respect each other's ideas, we can then find a solution in which both of us are winners.
Gary Chapman
We can choose the attitude that says, I have been wronged. People have hurt me, but with the help of God, I am going to learn how to return good for evil, and I am going to make a difference in this world.
Gary Chapman
Sex is the joining of two bodies love is the joining of two souls.
Gary Chapman
This is a huge thing if you are going to have a positive impact on your spouse. You have to not only realize this, but you have to practice this.
Gary Chapman
Love can be expressed and received in all five languages. However, if you don't speak a person's primary love language, that person will not feel loved, even though you may be speaking the other four. Once you are speaking his or her primary love language fluently, then you can sprinkle in the other four and they will be like icing on the cake.
Gary Chapman
The pattern often has been entrenched since childhood... [abusive people] don't think that there is anything wrong with them because that is the way they were brought up in their family.
Gary Chapman
People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.
Gary Chapman
The person who is in-love has the ilusion that his beloved is perfect.
Gary Chapman
If you grew up in a dysfunctional family, then there is really no hope for you to have a good relationship. That is another myth that we have to throw off, so that we can get into what I call Reality.
Gary Chapman
Love is the fundamental building block of all human relationships. It will greatly impact our values and morals. I am also convinced that love is the most important ingredient in the single 's search for meaning.
Gary Chapman
