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People do not get married planning to divorce. Divorce is the result of a lack of preparation for marriage and the failure to learn the skills of working together as teammates in an intimate relationship.

Gary Chapman

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Gary Chapman
Age: 86
Born: 1938
Born: January 10
Author
Radio Personality
Writer
Winston-Salem
North Carolina
Gary Demonte Chapman
Working
Lack
Learn
Result
Teammates
Together
Skills
Teammate
People
Failure
Divorced
Married
Divorce
Marriage
Preparation
Relationship
Intimate
Results
Planning

More quotes by Gary Chapman

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Remember that your ultimate goal is for your children to grow up secure in your love, strong in their faith, and with sound character.
Gary Chapman
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I think another [myth] is that some marriages are just hopeless. This is a common thing I hear from people, Well, I just think there are some marriages that are hopeless, Dr. Chapman, don't you agree with that? I say I understand the feeling, but the fact is that there are no marriages that are hopeless.
Gary Chapman
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Isolation is devastating to the human psyche.
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All of us blossom when we feel loved and wither when we do not feel loved.
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Love is the fundamental building block of all human relationships. It will greatly impact our values and morals. I am also convinced that love is the most important ingredient in the single 's search for meaning.
Gary Chapman
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Many couples have never learned the tremendous power of verbally affirming each other.
Gary Chapman
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Our spouse will usually interpret our message based on our tone of voice, not the words we use.
Gary Chapman
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People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.
Gary Chapman
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Others who openly discuss matters of spirituality often ignore the warning signs. They are so in love with each other, enjoy being with each other, and can see themselves making each other happy for the rest of their lives, and they close their eyes to huge differences in their views of spirituality.
Gary Chapman
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Love can be expressed and received in all five languages. However, if you don't speak a person's primary love language, that person will not feel loved, even though you may be speaking the other four. Once you are speaking his or her primary love language fluently, then you can sprinkle in the other four and they will be like icing on the cake.
Gary Chapman
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The person who is in-love has the ilusion that his beloved is perfect.
Gary Chapman
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When I admit my own imperfections, it doesn't mean I am a bad person.
Gary Chapman
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Love doesn't erase the past, but it makes the future different.
Gary Chapman
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Don't be a victim of the urgent. In the long run, much of what seems so pressing right now won't even matter. What you do with your children will matter forever.
Gary Chapman
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One [reality] is that I am responsible for my attitude. I can be in prison, and I happen to get a chance to go outside. I can look at the mud, or I can look at the stars. I am the one who decides which way to look. That is true for every one of us.
Gary Chapman
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If I walk in the house, and I greet my wife, and I give her a hug, kiss her on the cheek, and I say to her, Honey, how'd your day go, and I listed to how her day went. If I say, Is there anything I can do to help you, and she tells me, Honey, if you could peel the potatoes, or whatever, I have influenced my wife in a very positive way.
Gary Chapman
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Ask yourself: Does the action I am considering have any potential for dealing with the wrong and helping the relationship? And is it best for the person at whom I am angry? The two most constructive options are either to confront the person in a helpful way, or to consciously decide to overlook the matter.
Gary Chapman
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We cannot erase the past, but we can accept it as history.
Gary Chapman
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Real love - This kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth.
Gary Chapman
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I wrote this book [ Desperate Marriages] because of my own marriage. My wife and I struggled greatly in the early years of marriage. In spite of the fact that we were Christians before we got married, we prayed about getting married, we believed it was God's will for us to get married, and we still had great struggles.
Gary Chapman