Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Oysters are supposed to enhance your sexual performance, but they don't work for me. Maybe I put them on too soon.
Garry Shandling
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Garry Shandling
Age: 66 †
Born: 1949
Born: November 29
Died: 2016
Died: March 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Chicago
Illinois
Garry Emmanuel Shandling
Supposed
Soon
Maybe
Work
Oysters
Enhance
Sexual
Performance
Performances
More quotes by Garry Shandling
In the year 2525, that song will be even less popular than when it first came out.
Garry Shandling
My first appearance as a guest on The Tonight Show was in '81.
Garry Shandling
I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
Garry Shandling
I've never had anyone put on a puppet show to convince me of anything. And I've done a lot of stuff. I don't know that I would put the puppets on when I was pitching a show. This was the head of the studio putting a puppet show on. And I'll tell you, he wasn't bad.
Garry Shandling
The only way I would go back to hosting would be if it were something entirely new. It would prevent me from wanting to host a standard-fare kind of talk show.
Garry Shandling
It's not the hair on your head that matters. It's the kind of hair you have inside.
Garry Shandling
I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.
Garry Shandling
I don't know why men are so fascinated with television and I think it has something to do with - if I may judge from my own father, who used to sit and stare at the TV while my mother was speaking to him - I think that's a man's way of tuning out.
Garry Shandling
I like going into nature and that's where I'm happiest.
Garry Shandling
I think it's one of the main negative emotional ingredients that fuels show business, because there's so much at stake and the fear of failure looms large.
Garry Shandling
First of all, I'm not the kind of guy that likes to rehash the show and so forth and so on.
Garry Shandling
When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.
Garry Shandling
I'm very loyal in relationships. Even when I go out with my mom I don't look at other moms.
Garry Shandling
Dr. Phil is hiding something. Otherwise, why wouldn't he use his last name?
Garry Shandling
I actually think I'm more of a turtle than Verne is. Where Verne is up on two legs and moving at full speed and doesn't pull his head into the shell very often, I in reality was five or ten minutes later to every recording session.
Garry Shandling
I'm good in bed, actually, and I think I could learn to be a good communicator, too. The only trouble with that is it leads to marriage.
Garry Shandling
But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.
Garry Shandling
Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with.
Garry Shandling
I'm not a party guy. I don't carouse very much.
Garry Shandling
I guess he wanted to see a little more sexual activity because in real life, in bed I think less is more and let the woman come to me. Frankly, I don't even need a woman there.
Garry Shandling