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I sold my house this week. I got a pretty good price for it, but it made my landlord mad as hell

Garry Shandling

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Garry Shandling
Age: 66 †
Born: 1949
Born: November 29
Died: 2016
Died: March 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Chicago
Illinois
Garry Emmanuel Shandling
House
Landlord
Made
Sold
Good
Mad
Humorous
Price
Week
Hell
Pretty

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I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
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I think sometimes I should do more carousing, because I don't do much and maybe it would be fun occasionally. It's hard for me to have fun and I'm a serious thinker and a searcher and funny from the front.
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You know it's funny that none of the regular late-night shows now use guest hosts the way Johnny did. No one talks about it much, but it's curious that they don't do it. They would each have to be asked the reason why they don't.
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I think it's one of the main negative emotional ingredients that fuels show business, because there's so much at stake and the fear of failure looms large.
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I don''t like this reality television, I have to be honestI think real people should not be on television It''s for special people like us, people who have trained and studied to appear to be real
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When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.
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I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.
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It's not the hair on your head that matters. It's the kind of hair you have inside.
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I actually think I'm more of a turtle than Verne is. Where Verne is up on two legs and moving at full speed and doesn't pull his head into the shell very often, I in reality was five or ten minutes later to every recording session.
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Oysters are supposed to enhance your sexual performance, but they don't work for me. Maybe I put them on too soon.
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I don't know why men are so fascinated with television and I think it has something to do with - if I may judge from my own father, who used to sit and stare at the TV while my mother was speaking to him - I think that's a man's way of tuning out.
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After making love I said to my girl, Was it good for you too? And she said, I don't think this was good for anybody.
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My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.
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First of all, I'm not the kind of guy that likes to rehash the show and so forth and so on.
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I remember learning to drive on my dad's lap. Did you guys ever do that? He'd work the brakes. I'd work the wheel. Then I went to take the driver's test and sat on the examiner's lap. I failed the exam. But he still writes to me. That's the really nice part.
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But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.
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I think I look great in green, and I'm going to start wearing more green.
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I've never had anyone put on a puppet show to convince me of anything. And I've done a lot of stuff. I don't know that I would put the puppets on when I was pitching a show. This was the head of the studio putting a puppet show on. And I'll tell you, he wasn't bad.
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In the year 2525, that song will be even less popular than when it first came out.
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I like going into nature and that's where I'm happiest.
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