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I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.

Garry Shandling

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Garry Shandling
Age: 66 †
Born: 1949
Born: November 29
Died: 2016
Died: March 24
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Director
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Chicago
Illinois
Garry Emmanuel Shandling
Unaware
Valentine
Dating
Single
Woman
Evidently
Singles

More quotes by Garry Shandling

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The only way I would go back to hosting would be if it were something entirely new. It would prevent me from wanting to host a standard-fare kind of talk show.
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First of all, I'm not the kind of guy that likes to rehash the show and so forth and so on.
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Without comedy as a defense mechanism I wouldn't be able to survive.
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I don''t like this reality television, I have to be honestI think real people should not be on television It''s for special people like us, people who have trained and studied to appear to be real
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I have such poor vision I can date anybody.
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In the year 2525, that song will be even less popular than when it first came out.
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I think I look great in green, and I'm going to start wearing more green.
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Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.
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Women need to know that not all guys are going to hurt them the way that the guy did before they started dating me. I know guys I wouldn't go out with.
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I'm not a party guy. I don't carouse very much.
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I'm good in bed, actually, and I think I could learn to be a good communicator, too. The only trouble with that is it leads to marriage.
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When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.
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I think it's one of the main negative emotional ingredients that fuels show business, because there's so much at stake and the fear of failure looms large.
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Oysters are supposed to enhance your sexual performance, but they don't work for me. Maybe I put them on too soon.
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I've never had anyone put on a puppet show to convince me of anything. And I've done a lot of stuff. I don't know that I would put the puppets on when I was pitching a show. This was the head of the studio putting a puppet show on. And I'll tell you, he wasn't bad.
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I guess he wanted to see a little more sexual activity because in real life, in bed I think less is more and let the woman come to me. Frankly, I don't even need a woman there.
Garry Shandling
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I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.
Garry Shandling
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I remember learning to drive on my dad's lap. Did you guys ever do that? He'd work the brakes. I'd work the wheel. Then I went to take the driver's test and sat on the examiner's lap. I failed the exam. But he still writes to me. That's the really nice part.
Garry Shandling
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It's not the hair on your head that matters. It's the kind of hair you have inside.
Garry Shandling
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You know it's funny that none of the regular late-night shows now use guest hosts the way Johnny did. No one talks about it much, but it's curious that they don't do it. They would each have to be asked the reason why they don't.
Garry Shandling