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I think that you are only obliged to be a humorist from the age of 18 until you turn 30. Past the age of 30 I don't think there is any obligation to be clever at all.

Garrison Keillor

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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
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Television Producer
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Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
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More quotes by Garrison Keillor

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One reads books in order to gain the privilege of living more than one life. People who don't read are trapped in a mine shaft, even if they think the sun is shining.
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I love rhymes I love to write a poem about New York and rhyme 'oysters' with 'The Cloisters.' And 'The lady from Knoxville who bought her brassieres by the boxful.' I just feel a sort of small triumph.
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It is a sin to believe evil of others but it is seldom a mistake.
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A child can educate just about anybody.
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I think if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world for all of us.
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Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
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When you're old you feast on your memories, and if you spend too much time on exercise, you may get old and not have many.
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A young writer is easily tempted by the allusive and ethereal and ironic and reflective, but the declarative is at the bottom of most good writing.
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Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesnt kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
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Eating a little was like vomiting a little, just as bad as a lot.
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No innocent man buys a gun, and no happy man writes his memoirs.
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I've wanted to be a writer since I was a boy, though it seemed an unlikely outcome since I showed no real talent. But I persevered and eventually found my own row to hoe. Ignorance of other writers' work keeps me from discouragement and I am less well-read than the average bus driver.
Garrison Keillor
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The socially redeeming aspect of golf lies in the vast number of lawyers and bankers and managers who play it, and when you think of the damage they would do if they were at the job instead, you can see why golf courses are a wise investment for any municipality.
Garrison Keillor
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I've seen the truth, and it makes no sense.
Garrison Keillor
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The majority of people who keel over dead at concerts are killed by a long trumpet passage.
Garrison Keillor
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Ha! Easy for nuns to talk about giving up things. That's what they do for a living.
Garrison Keillor
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I felt bad for that world that we have given a generation of kids.
Garrison Keillor
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Love has the power to rescue us and not let go, otherwise it isn't love
Garrison Keillor
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To your left is the marina where several senior cabinet officials keep luxury yachts for weekend cruises on the Potomac. Some of these ships are up to 100 feet in length the Presidential yacht is over 200 feet in length, and can remain submerged for up to 3 weeks.
Garrison Keillor
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Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
Garrison Keillor