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To Norwegians, the polka is a form of martial art.

Garrison Keillor

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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Polka
Norwegians
Martial
Art
Form

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

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Take care of your friends. Because there will come a time when you'll be no good to anyone, and the only reason for people to talk to you will be sheer habit.
Garrison Keillor
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Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
Garrison Keillor
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In the end, all solutions are temporary.
Garrison Keillor
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Men peak at age nineteen and go downhill.
Garrison Keillor
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The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
Garrison Keillor
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No innocent man buys a gun, and no happy man writes his memoirs.
Garrison Keillor
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Humor has to surprise us otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore.
Garrison Keillor
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To your left is the marina where several senior cabinet officials keep luxury yachts for weekend cruises on the Potomac. Some of these ships are up to 100 feet in length the Presidential yacht is over 200 feet in length, and can remain submerged for up to 3 weeks.
Garrison Keillor
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This is the big reason most humorists fail. Drunks don't read books.
Garrison Keillor
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Being rich and thin isn't everything.
Garrison Keillor
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Being Lutheran, Mother believed that self-pity is a deadly sin and so is nostalgia, and she had no time for either
Garrison Keillor
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She gave him such a look... Man oh man, if looks could kill. That one might have totalled a city block.
Garrison Keillor
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Face it: a nation that maintains a 72% approval rating on George W. Bush is a nation with a very loose grip on reality.
Garrison Keillor
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It is a sin to believe evil of others but it is seldom a mistake.
Garrison Keillor
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Writing is the main gig and teaching and performing are sidelines, an excuse for not writing more. Working on a novel and on an opera make me seriously want to retire and find a volunteer job as a docent at the zoo explaining to schoolchildren where frogs go in the winter.
Garrison Keillor
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I love rhymes I love to write a poem about New York and rhyme 'oysters' with 'The Cloisters.' And 'The lady from Knoxville who bought her brassieres by the boxful.' I just feel a sort of small triumph.
Garrison Keillor
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Have interesting failures.... If you need to have a personal crisis have it now. Don't wait until midlife, when it will take longer to resolve.... Don't pity yourselves. Lighten up. Seek people with a sense of humor. Avoid humorless people-and do not marry one, for God's sake.
Garrison Keillor
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Roy Blount's stuff makes me laugh so hard, sometimes I have to go sit in a room and shut the door
Garrison Keillor
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If you can't trust a Methodist with absolute power to arrest people and not have to say why, then whom can you trust?
Garrison Keillor
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Minnesota is a state of public-spirited and polite people, where you can get a good cappucino and eat Thai food and find any book you want and yet live on a quiet tree-lined street with a backyard and send your kids to public school. When a state this good hits the jackpot, it can only be an inspiration to everybody.
Garrison Keillor