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Winter: It's not just a season, it's who we are.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Seasons
Winter
Season
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
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Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
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English is the perfect language for preachers because it allows you to talk until you think of what to say.
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A minister has to be able to read a clock. At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast and get the peas out of the freezer.
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Those people on daytime TV talking about how their parents never gave them the positive feedback they needed and that's why they shot them- those are not Minnesotans.
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I usually don't work with other people I do the whole show myself.
Garrison Keillor
Sport is a seductive metaphor (life as a game in which we gain victory through hard work, discipline, and visualizing success). but the older metaphor of farming (life as hard labor that is subject to weather and quirks of blind fate and may return no reward whatsoever and don't be surprised) is still in our blood.
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I hear a little firecracker go off when you come up with a good rhyme.
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Enough. Man is capable of reform once presented with the facts, and the fact is that bottling water and shipping it is a big waste of fuel, so stop already.
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I write on a laptop, so it's impossible to count drafts anymore.
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Sometimes you have to avoid mentioning things because people's feelings are tender.
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This is the big reason most humorists fail. Drunks don't read books.
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It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars.
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Years ago, manhood was an opportunity for achievement, and now it is a problem to be overcome.
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The majority of people who keel over dead at concerts are killed by a long trumpet passage.
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Humor is not a trick, not jokes. Humor is a presence in the world - like grace - and shines on everybody.
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Childhood is the small town everyone came from.
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Some of us have a relentless urge to attempt what we can never be good at and neglect our true calling.
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Marrying for sex is like flying to London for the free peanuts and pretzels. It's not the point of the thing, is it?
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The reason to retire is to try to avoid embarrassment you ought to do it before people are dropping big hints. You want to be the first to come up with the idea. You don't want to wait until you trip and fall off the stage.
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