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Humor needs to come in under cover of darkness, in disguise, and surprise people.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Darkness
Humor
Come
Needs
People
Disguise
Cover
Surprise
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
Some of us have a relentless urge to attempt what we can never be good at and neglect our true calling.
Garrison Keillor
As a former English major, I am a sitting duck for Gift Books, and in the past few years I've gotten Dickens, Thackeray, Smollet, Richardson, Emerson, Keats, Boswell and the Brontes, all of them Great, none of them ever read by me, all of them now on a shelf, looking at me and making me feel guilty.
Garrison Keillor
In Lake Wobegon, we don't forget mistakes.
Garrison Keillor
March is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hangover is like.
Garrison Keillor
Freedom doesn't mean aimlessness. We can't just sleepwalk through life.... Freedom demands structure.
Garrison Keillor
Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and the decades cannot improve.
Garrison Keillor
People in cars cause accidents and accidents in cars cause people.
Garrison Keillor
A good friend is a person who thinks you're one of the good eggs, even if he knows you're a little cracked.
Garrison Keillor
Roy Blount's stuff makes me laugh so hard, sometimes I have to go sit in a room and shut the door
Garrison Keillor
I felt bad for that world that we have given a generation of kids.
Garrison Keillor
Children can find other children to be pals. Children need fathers to be fathers.
Garrison Keillor
I feel it's so hard for young actors It's a different world that they're coming up in there's so much money to be made off of their personal lives, and people are bound and determined to make that money.
Garrison Keillor
Beauty isn't worth thinking about what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor
Garrison Keillor
Liberalism is dead, so dead that Democrats have all become moderate Republicans, and the heavy hand of Big Government is now limp and damp and trembly.
Garrison Keillor
I loved feeling special. I hated feeling special.
Garrison Keillor
You're such a big liar you gotta get your neighbor to call your dog.
Garrison Keillor
For me, the monologue was the favorite thing I had done in radio. It was based on writing, but in the end it was radio, it was standing up and leaning forward into the dark and talking, letting words come out of you.
Garrison Keillor
Pumpkin pie is a living symbol of mediocrity. The best pumpkin pie you ever ate wasn't all that much different from the worst pumpkin pie you ever ate.
Garrison Keillor
Honesty is a rare commodity in a palace, and that is why so many fairy-tale marriages end up on the rocks.
Garrison Keillor
... I never was one to get upset about a few scratches on a motor vehicle, it is meant to be used, not saved.
Garrison Keillor
