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That's why God created marriage, so people wouldn't have to fight with strangers.

Garrison Keillor

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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Stranger
Created
Marriage
Wouldn
Fight
Fighting
People
Strangers

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

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Humor, a good sense of it, is to Americans what manhood is to Spaniards, and we will go to great lengths to prove it. Experiments with laboratory rats have shown that, if one psychologist in the room laughs at something a rat does, all of the other psychologists will laugh equally. Nobody wants to be left holding the joke.
Garrison Keillor
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Most men are prisoners at best, Who some strong habit every drag about Like chain and ball.
Garrison Keillor
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Your life is a work of art, and in the end, the underlying theme of great art is bravery and hope and love.
Garrison Keillor
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...opening up a newspaper is the key to looking classy and smart. Never mind the bronze-plated stuff about the role of the press in a democracy - a newspaper, kiddo, is about Style.
Garrison Keillor
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..people (in Minnesota) avoid stupidity when possible, not wanting to be a $10 haircut on a 50 cent head.
Garrison Keillor
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Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesnt kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
Garrison Keillor
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I hear a little firecracker go off when you come up with a good rhyme.
Garrison Keillor
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My ancestors were Puritans from England. They arrived here in 1648 in the hope of finding greater restrictions than were permissible under English law at that time.
Garrison Keillor
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If you lived today as if it were your last, you'd buy up a box of rockets and fire them all off, wouldn't you?
Garrison Keillor
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Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
Garrison Keillor
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We thank you [the soldiers recently returned from the middle east] for your service.
Garrison Keillor
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I've wanted to be a writer since I was a boy, though it seemed an unlikely outcome since I showed no real talent. But I persevered and eventually found my own row to hoe. Ignorance of other writers' work keeps me from discouragement and I am less well-read than the average bus driver.
Garrison Keillor
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The socially redeeming aspect of golf lies in the vast number of lawyers and bankers and managers who play it, and when you think of the damage they would do if they were at the job instead, you can see why golf courses are a wise investment for any municipality.
Garrison Keillor
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Winter: It's not just a season, it's who we are.
Garrison Keillor
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In the end, all solutions are temporary.
Garrison Keillor
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Before the world was made, when it was only darkness and mist and waters, God was well aware of Lake Wobegon, my family, our house, and He had me all sketched out down to what size my feet would be (big), which bike I would ride (Schwinn), and the five ears of corn I'd eat for supper that night.
Garrison Keillor
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The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
Garrison Keillor
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You get old and you realize there are no answers, just stories.
Garrison Keillor
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To choose Norm Coleman over Walter Mondale is like going to a great steakhouse and ordering the tuna sandwich.
Garrison Keillor
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Eating a little was like vomiting a little, just as bad as a lot.
Garrison Keillor