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That's why God created marriage, so people wouldn't have to fight with strangers.

Garrison Keillor

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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Fighting
People
Strangers
Stranger
Created
Marriage
Wouldn
Fight

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

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People in cars cause accidents and accidents in cars cause people.
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It is more worthy in the eyes of God . . . if a writer makes three pages sharp and funny about the lives of geese than to make three hundred fat and flabby about God or the American people.
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As a former English major, I am a sitting duck for Gift Books, and in the past few years I've gotten Dickens, Thackeray, Smollet, Richardson, Emerson, Keats, Boswell and the Brontes, all of them Great, none of them ever read by me, all of them now on a shelf, looking at me and making me feel guilty.
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I want to resume the life of a shy person.
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I remember when I switched from Christmas to sex as the secret of happiness.
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When you wage war on the public schools, you're attacking the mortar that holds the community together. You're not a conservative, you're a vandal.
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Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.
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Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
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As for kissing on the first date, you should never date someone whom you would not wish to kiss immediately.
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Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
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Minnesota is a state of public-spirited and polite people, where you can get a good cappucino and eat Thai food and find any book you want and yet live on a quiet tree-lined street with a backyard and send your kids to public school. When a state this good hits the jackpot, it can only be an inspiration to everybody.
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A person does feel sheepish picking on journalists, a class already so richly despised that if a planeload of them crashed in flames, most people would smile from pure reflex.
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Some people have a love of their fellow man in their hearts, and others require a light anesthetic.
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A child can educate just about anybody.
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If you lived today as if it were your last, you'd buy up a box of rockets and fire them all off, wouldn't you?
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One day Donald Trump will discover that he is owned by Lutheran Brotherhood and must re negotiate his debt load with a committee of silent Norwegians who dont understand why anyone would pay more than $120.00 for a suit.
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Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
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I think that you are only obliged to be a humorist from the age of 18 until you turn 30. Past the age of 30 I don't think there is any obligation to be clever at all.
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Your car, comfort though it be, this little den and dining room on wheels, is a prison that deadens your senses, and to feel wholly alive you must go for a walk.
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Sex is not a mechanical act that fails for lack of technique, and it is not a performance by the male for the audience of the female it is a continuum of attraction that extends from the simplest conversation and the most innocent touching through the act of coitus.
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