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Scripture doesn't promise that God will remove temptation, only that you'll be given strength to withstand it.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Withstand
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Temptation
Scripture
Promise
Strength
Given
Doesn
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
When you wage war on the public schools, you're attacking the mortar that holds the community together. You're not a conservative, you're a vandal.
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I've seen the truth, and it makes no sense.
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Humor has to surprise us otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore.
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March is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hangover is like.
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The mass of men lead lives of shallow happiness the superior man exults in his gloom.
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Children can find other children to be pals. Children need fathers to be fathers.
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Second violins can play a concerto perfectly if they're in their own home and nobody's there.
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We English majors...need to promote public libraries as a tool in the war against terror. How many readers of Edith Wharton have engaged in terroristic acts? I challenge you to name one...Do we need to wait until our cities lie in smoking ruins before we wake up to the fact that a first-class public library is a vital link in national defense?
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No innocent man buys a gun, and no happy man writes his memoirs.
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Don't pour the oil directly into my navel, pour it on my sternum and let it run down into my navel, you ignorant peasant.
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For me, the monologue was the favorite thing I had done in radio. It was based on writing, but in the end it was radio, it was standing up and leaning forward into the dark and talking, letting words come out of you.
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The majority of people who keel over dead at concerts are killed by a long trumpet passage.
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A book is a gift you can open again and again.
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Easter is so disappointing. You suffer all the way through lent, and what do you get for it? A ham.
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A person does feel sheepish picking on journalists, a class already so richly despised that if a planeload of them crashed in flames, most people would smile from pure reflex.
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It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.
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The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
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Men peak at age nineteen and go downhill.
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If you can't trust a Methodist with absolute power to arrest people and not have to say why, then whom can you trust?
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Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
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