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Men peak at age nineteen and go downhill.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Age
Men
Downhill
Nineteen
Peak
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
Pumpkin pie is a living symbol of mediocrity. The best pumpkin pie you ever ate wasn't all that much different from the worst pumpkin pie you ever ate.
Garrison Keillor
When you wage war on the public schools, you're attacking the mortar that holds the community together. You're not a conservative, you're a vandal.
Garrison Keillor
No innocent man buys a gun, and no happy man writes his memoirs.
Garrison Keillor
Marrying for sex is like flying to London for the free peanuts and pretzels. It's not the point of the thing, is it?
Garrison Keillor
For me, the monologue was the favorite thing I had done in radio. It was based on writing, but in the end it was radio, it was standing up and leaning forward into the dark and talking, letting words come out of you.
Garrison Keillor
I felt bad for that world that we have given a generation of kids.
Garrison Keillor
People in cars cause accidents and accidents in cars cause people.
Garrison Keillor
March is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hangover is like.
Garrison Keillor
To choose Norm Coleman over Walter Mondale is like going to a great steakhouse and ordering the tuna sandwich.
Garrison Keillor
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.
Garrison Keillor
IMPORTANT Book reading is a solitary and sedentary pursuit, and those who do are cautioned that a book should be used as an integral part of a well-rounded life, including a daily regimen of rigorous physical exercise, rewarding personal relationships, and sensible low-fat diet. A book should not be used a as a substitute or an excuse.
Garrison Keillor
Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
Garrison Keillor
Being an English major prepares you for impersonating authority.
Garrison Keillor
Writing is the main gig and teaching and performing are sidelines, an excuse for not writing more. Working on a novel and on an opera make me seriously want to retire and find a volunteer job as a docent at the zoo explaining to schoolchildren where frogs go in the winter.
Garrison Keillor
I loved feeling special. I hated feeling special.
Garrison Keillor
It's confidence it has to be something good about getting old. One of the things is that you just don't stress about some stuff that made you so worried.
Garrison Keillor
They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.
Garrison Keillor
Humor is not a trick, not jokes. Humor is a presence in the world - like grace - and shines on everybody.
Garrison Keillor
...opening up a newspaper is the key to looking classy and smart. Never mind the bronze-plated stuff about the role of the press in a democracy - a newspaper, kiddo, is about Style.
Garrison Keillor
I was brought up imagining that cream rises to the top, merit wins out, the race is to the swift and riches to men of understanding, but it ain't necessarily so. The swift stand a better chance if they are also beautiful.
Garrison Keillor