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... I never was one to get upset about a few scratches on a motor vehicle, it is meant to be used, not saved.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Vehicle
Upset
Saved
Meant
Use
Used
Never
Scratches
Motor
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
Lake Wobegon, the little town that time forgot and the decades cannot improve.
Garrison Keillor
To Norwegians, the polka is a form of martial art.
Garrison Keillor
A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it.
Garrison Keillor
In Lake Wobegon, we don't forget mistakes.
Garrison Keillor
Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
Garrison Keillor
Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesnt kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
Garrison Keillor
I think that you are only obliged to be a humorist from the age of 18 until you turn 30. Past the age of 30 I don't think there is any obligation to be clever at all.
Garrison Keillor
You get old and you realize there are no answers, just stories.
Garrison Keillor
If you lived today as if it were your last, you'd buy up a box of rockets and fire them all off, wouldn't you?
Garrison Keillor
That's what I am, Frank thought, an ordinary genius. He had unlocked the secret of radio. The sport of the ordinary! Brillliant me like Reed Seymour couldn't figure this out for the life of them! Reed was ashamed of radio. ...radio was a cinch if you kept reaching down and grabbing up handfuls of the ordinary.
Garrison Keillor
Enough. Man is capable of reform once presented with the facts, and the fact is that bottling water and shipping it is a big waste of fuel, so stop already.
Garrison Keillor
Jesus said the meek would inherit the earth, but so far all we've gotten is Minnesota and North Dakota.
Garrison Keillor
Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
Garrison Keillor
Nothing you do for children is ever wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted.
Garrison Keillor
We all know you can get AIDS from sex, but did you know that you can get sex from aides?
Garrison Keillor
A good friend is a person who thinks you're one of the good eggs, even if he knows you're a little cracked.
Garrison Keillor
Pumpkin pie is a living symbol of mediocrity. The best pumpkin pie you ever ate wasn't all that much different from the worst pumpkin pie you ever ate.
Garrison Keillor
When you're old you feast on your memories, and if you spend too much time on exercise, you may get old and not have many.
Garrison Keillor
I love New York, and I'm drawn to a certain intensity of life, but I've just never felt like I want to escape from the Midwest. A writer lives a great deal in his own head, and so one intuitively finds places where your head is more clear. New York for me is one of those places.
Garrison Keillor
Sometimes there is nothing you can do, and in those times, you must do something anyway.
Garrison Keillor