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I remember when I switched from Christmas to sex as the secret of happiness.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Happiness
Remember
Switched
Christmas
Sex
Secret
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
I love rhymes I love to write a poem about New York and rhyme 'oysters' with 'The Cloisters.' And 'The lady from Knoxville who bought her brassieres by the boxful.' I just feel a sort of small triumph.
Garrison Keillor
The great unrequited love tears open your heart to the beauty of the world, its small rivers and upland meadows. It also makes you kinder to the next hundred thousand persons who cross your path.
Garrison Keillor
Your life is a work of art, and in the end, the underlying theme of great art is bravery and hope and love.
Garrison Keillor
I can write anywhere. I write in airports. I write on airplanes. I've written in the back seats of taxis. I write in hotel rooms. I love hotel rooms. I just write wherever I am whenever I need to write.
Garrison Keillor
Jesus said the meek would inherit the earth, but so far all we've gotten is Minnesota and North Dakota.
Garrison Keillor
Second violins can play a concerto perfectly if they're in their own home and nobody's there.
Garrison Keillor
Winter: It's not just a season, it's who we are.
Garrison Keillor
I felt bad for that world that we have given a generation of kids.
Garrison Keillor
Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
Garrison Keillor
Nothing that readers say or do strikes me as a nuisance. Anyone who cracks open a book of mine is, to me, a gem.
Garrison Keillor
Humor, a good sense of it, is to Americans what manhood is to Spaniards, and we will go to great lengths to prove it. Experiments with laboratory rats have shown that, if one psychologist in the room laughs at something a rat does, all of the other psychologists will laugh equally. Nobody wants to be left holding the joke.
Garrison Keillor
Minnesota is a state of public-spirited and polite people, where you can get a good cappucino and eat Thai food and find any book you want and yet live on a quiet tree-lined street with a backyard and send your kids to public school. When a state this good hits the jackpot, it can only be an inspiration to everybody.
Garrison Keillor
Enough. Man is capable of reform once presented with the facts, and the fact is that bottling water and shipping it is a big waste of fuel, so stop already.
Garrison Keillor
Childhood is the small town everyone came from.
Garrison Keillor
Men peak at age nineteen and go downhill.
Garrison Keillor
Most men are prisoners at best, Who some strong habit every drag about Like chain and ball.
Garrison Keillor
Your car, comfort though it be, this little den and dining room on wheels, is a prison that deadens your senses, and to feel wholly alive you must go for a walk.
Garrison Keillor
Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesnt kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
Garrison Keillor
You're such a big liar you gotta get your neighbor to call your dog.
Garrison Keillor
Writing is the main gig and teaching and performing are sidelines, an excuse for not writing more. Working on a novel and on an opera make me seriously want to retire and find a volunteer job as a docent at the zoo explaining to schoolchildren where frogs go in the winter.
Garrison Keillor