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Where I come from, when a Catholic marries a Lutheran it is considered the first step on the road to Minneapolis.

Garrison Keillor

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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Catholic
Road
Step
Steps
Lutheran
Firsts
Lutherans
Come
Minneapolis
First
Marries
Considered

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

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Honesty is a rare commodity in a palace, and that is why so many fairy-tale marriages end up on the rocks.
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Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
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Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
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Being rich and thin isn't everything.
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Marrying for sex is like flying to London for the free peanuts and pretzels. It's not the point of the thing, is it?
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Your life is a work of art, and in the end, the underlying theme of great art is bravery and hope and love.
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One day Donald Trump will discover that he is owned by Lutheran Brotherhood and must re negotiate his debt load with a committee of silent Norwegians who dont understand why anyone would pay more than $120.00 for a suit.
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The greatness of America is that it produces exuberant geniuses like Louis Armstrong and Fred Astaire and Leonard Bernstein. We are meant to be a jazzy people who talk big and jump on the table and dance we aren't supposed to be dopey and glum and brood over old injuries.
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We all know you can get AIDS from sex, but did you know that you can get sex from aides?
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When the country goes temporarily to the dogs, cats must learn to be circumspect, walk on fences, sleep in trees, and have faith that all this woofing is not the last word.
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Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
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I talk in subjects and verbs, and sort of wind around in concentric circles until I get far enough away from the beginning so that I can call it the end, and it ends.
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It's confidence it has to be something good about getting old. One of the things is that you just don't stress about some stuff that made you so worried.
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IMPORTANT Book reading is a solitary and sedentary pursuit, and those who do are cautioned that a book should be used as an integral part of a well-rounded life, including a daily regimen of rigorous physical exercise, rewarding personal relationships, and sensible low-fat diet. A book should not be used a as a substitute or an excuse.
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I usually don't work with other people I do the whole show myself.
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Easter is so disappointing. You suffer all the way through lent, and what do you get for it? A ham.
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Humor is not a trick, not jokes. Humor is a presence in the world - like grace - and shines on everybody.
Garrison Keillor
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Nothing that readers say or do strikes me as a nuisance. Anyone who cracks open a book of mine is, to me, a gem.
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A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it.
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Sport is a seductive metaphor (life as a game in which we gain victory through hard work, discipline, and visualizing success). but the older metaphor of farming (life as hard labor that is subject to weather and quirks of blind fate and may return no reward whatsoever and don't be surprised) is still in our blood.
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