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Where I come from, when a Catholic marries a Lutheran it is considered the first step on the road to Minneapolis.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Come
Minneapolis
First
Marries
Considered
Catholic
Road
Step
Steps
Lutheran
Firsts
Lutherans
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
This is the big reason most humorists fail. Drunks don't read books.
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I want to resume the life of a shy person.
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One day Donald Trump will discover that he is owned by Lutheran Brotherhood and must re negotiate his debt load with a committee of silent Norwegians who dont understand why anyone would pay more than $120.00 for a suit.
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Your car, comfort though it be, this little den and dining room on wheels, is a prison that deadens your senses, and to feel wholly alive you must go for a walk.
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Most men are prisoners at best, Who some strong habit every drag about Like chain and ball.
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A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
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A person does feel sheepish picking on journalists, a class already so richly despised that if a planeload of them crashed in flames, most people would smile from pure reflex.
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Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesnt kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
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I've seen the truth, and it makes no sense.
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In Lake Wobegon, we don't forget mistakes.
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You get old and you realize there are no answers, just stories.
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We all know you can get AIDS from sex, but did you know that you can get sex from aides?
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Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
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You now have learned enough to see That Cats are much like you and me And other people whom we find Possessed of various types of mind. For some are sane and some are mad And some are good and some are bad And some are better, some are worse But all may be described in verse.
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People in cars cause accidents and accidents in cars cause people.
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Roy Blount's stuff makes me laugh so hard, sometimes I have to go sit in a room and shut the door
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Dogs don't lie and why should I? Strangers come they growl and bark, they know their loved ones in the dark, Now let me, by night or day, Be just as full of truth as they.
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Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.
Garrison Keillor
We come from people who brought us up to believe that life is a struggle, and if you should feel really happy, be patient: this will pass.
Garrison Keillor
Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
Garrison Keillor