Quote

The reason to retire is to try to avoid embarrassment you ought to do it before people are dropping big hints. You want to be the first to come up with the idea. You don't want to wait until you trip and fall off the stage.

Garrison Keillor

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
First
Waiting
Embarrassment
Trying
Bigs
Dropping
People
Idea
Trip
Fall
Retiring
Ideas
Avoid
Reason
Wait
Firsts
Ought
Hints
Come
Stage
Retire

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

Image
IMPORTANT Book reading is a solitary and sedentary pursuit, and those who do are cautioned that a book should be used as an integral part of a well-rounded life, including a daily regimen of rigorous physical exercise, rewarding personal relationships, and sensible low-fat diet. A book should not be used a as a substitute or an excuse.
Garrison Keillor
Image
I remember when I switched from Christmas to sex as the secret of happiness.
Garrison Keillor
Image
She gave him such a look... Man oh man, if looks could kill. That one might have totalled a city block.
Garrison Keillor
Image
I want to resume the life of a shy person.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Children can find other children to be pals. Children need fathers to be fathers.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Humor needs to come in under cover of darkness, in disguise, and surprise people.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
Garrison Keillor
Image
One day Donald Trump will discover that he is owned by Lutheran Brotherhood and must re negotiate his debt load with a committee of silent Norwegians who dont understand why anyone would pay more than $120.00 for a suit.
Garrison Keillor
Image
The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Second violins can play a concerto perfectly if they're in their own home and nobody's there.
Garrison Keillor
Image
March is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hangover is like.
Garrison Keillor
Image
I've seen the truth, and it makes no sense.
Garrison Keillor
Image
One reads books in order to gain the privilege of living more than one life. People who don't read are trapped in a mine shaft, even if they think the sun is shining.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Sex is not a mechanical act that fails for lack of technique, and it is not a performance by the male for the audience of the female it is a continuum of attraction that extends from the simplest conversation and the most innocent touching through the act of coitus.
Garrison Keillor
Image
People always are encouraging about a terrible loss, so that sometimes the loser would like to strangle them.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Freedom doesn't mean aimlessness. We can't just sleepwalk through life.... Freedom demands structure.
Garrison Keillor
Image
...opening up a newspaper is the key to looking classy and smart. Never mind the bronze-plated stuff about the role of the press in a democracy - a newspaper, kiddo, is about Style.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Being an English major prepares you for impersonating authority.
Garrison Keillor
Image
The mass of men lead lives of shallow happiness the superior man exults in his gloom.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.
Garrison Keillor