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English is the perfect language for preachers because it allows you to talk until you think of what to say.
Garrison Keillor
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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
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English
Talk
Perfect
Language
Think
Thinking
Preachers
Preacher
More quotes by Garrison Keillor
I've wanted to be a writer since I was a boy, though it seemed an unlikely outcome since I showed no real talent. But I persevered and eventually found my own row to hoe. Ignorance of other writers' work keeps me from discouragement and I am less well-read than the average bus driver.
Garrison Keillor
It's confidence it has to be something good about getting old. One of the things is that you just don't stress about some stuff that made you so worried.
Garrison Keillor
Face it: a nation that maintains a 72% approval rating on George W. Bush is a nation with a very loose grip on reality.
Garrison Keillor
Beauty isn't worth thinking about what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor
Garrison Keillor
The mass of men lead lives of shallow happiness the superior man exults in his gloom.
Garrison Keillor
Marrying for sex is like flying to London for the free peanuts and pretzels. It's not the point of the thing, is it?
Garrison Keillor
One reads books in order to gain the privilege of living more than one life. People who don't read are trapped in a mine shaft, even if they think the sun is shining.
Garrison Keillor
Men peak at age nineteen and go downhill.
Garrison Keillor
In romance, as in life, you only learn when you're losing.
Garrison Keillor
We all know you can get AIDS from sex, but did you know that you can get sex from aides?
Garrison Keillor
I have taken so many wrong turns and been so careless with precious things and managed to lose, or break, or leave out in the rain so much that I loved.
Garrison Keillor
I can write anywhere. I write in airports. I write on airplanes. I've written in the back seats of taxis. I write in hotel rooms. I love hotel rooms. I just write wherever I am whenever I need to write.
Garrison Keillor
I talk in subjects and verbs, and sort of wind around in concentric circles until I get far enough away from the beginning so that I can call it the end, and it ends.
Garrison Keillor
I don't associate work with feelings of satisfaction. Rather, guilt, frustration, and resentment of people who write better than I do.
Garrison Keillor
This is the big reason most humorists fail. Drunks don't read books.
Garrison Keillor
We thank you [the soldiers recently returned from the middle east] for your service.
Garrison Keillor
I feel it's so hard for young actors It's a different world that they're coming up in there's so much money to be made off of their personal lives, and people are bound and determined to make that money.
Garrison Keillor
People in cars cause accidents and accidents in cars cause people.
Garrison Keillor
Childhood is the small town everyone came from.
Garrison Keillor
... and people are to march around the church to commemorate the event, Palm Sunday, when Jesus rode into Jerusalem and was greeted with applause and with palms. People thought he had come to overthrow the Romans, but ... no ... he had come to change THEM ... and that led to things turning bad.
Garrison Keillor