Quote

Easter is so disappointing. You suffer all the way through lent, and what do you get for it? A ham.

Garrison Keillor

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Disappointing
Easter
Suffer
Suffering
Way
Lent
Ham

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

Image
I usually don't work with other people I do the whole show myself.
Garrison Keillor
Image
It's confidence it has to be something good about getting old. One of the things is that you just don't stress about some stuff that made you so worried.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Sometimes you have to avoid mentioning things because people's feelings are tender.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Those people on daytime TV talking about how their parents never gave them the positive feedback they needed and that's why they shot them- those are not Minnesotans.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Dogs don't lie and why should I? Strangers come they growl and bark, they know their loved ones in the dark, Now let me, by night or day, Be just as full of truth as they.
Garrison Keillor
Image
I talk in subjects and verbs, and sort of wind around in concentric circles until I get far enough away from the beginning so that I can call it the end, and it ends.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Nothing you do for children is ever wasted.
Garrison Keillor
Image
A child can educate just about anybody.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Writing is the main gig and teaching and performing are sidelines, an excuse for not writing more. Working on a novel and on an opera make me seriously want to retire and find a volunteer job as a docent at the zoo explaining to schoolchildren where frogs go in the winter.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Humor has to surprise us otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore.
Garrison Keillor
Image
No innocent man buys a gun, and no happy man writes his memoirs.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Spending time in a church does not make you religious, any more than spending time in a garage makes you a car.
Garrison Keillor
Image
That's what I am, Frank thought, an ordinary genius. He had unlocked the secret of radio. The sport of the ordinary! Brillliant me like Reed Seymour couldn't figure this out for the life of them! Reed was ashamed of radio. ...radio was a cinch if you kept reaching down and grabbing up handfuls of the ordinary.
Garrison Keillor
Image
This is the big reason most humorists fail. Drunks don't read books.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Sometimes there is nothing you can do, and in those times, you must do something anyway.
Garrison Keillor
Image
A book is a gift you can open again and again.
Garrison Keillor
Image
Being rich and thin isn't everything.
Garrison Keillor
Image
I want to resume the life of a shy person.
Garrison Keillor
Image
We come from people who brought us up to believe that life is a struggle, and if you should feel really happy, be patient: this will pass.
Garrison Keillor
Image
The greatness of America is that it produces exuberant geniuses like Louis Armstrong and Fred Astaire and Leonard Bernstein. We are meant to be a jazzy people who talk big and jump on the table and dance we aren't supposed to be dopey and glum and brood over old injuries.
Garrison Keillor