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I've seen the truth, and it makes no sense.

Garrison Keillor

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Garrison Keillor
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: August 7
Author
Comedian
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Anoka
Minnesota
Gary Edward Keillor
Seen
Sense
Makes
Truth

More quotes by Garrison Keillor

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You now have learned enough to see That Cats are much like you and me And other people whom we find Possessed of various types of mind. For some are sane and some are mad And some are good and some are bad And some are better, some are worse — But all may be described in verse.
Garrison Keillor
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Writing is the main gig and teaching and performing are sidelines, an excuse for not writing more. Working on a novel and on an opera make me seriously want to retire and find a volunteer job as a docent at the zoo explaining to schoolchildren where frogs go in the winter.
Garrison Keillor
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I have taken so many wrong turns and been so careless with precious things and managed to lose, or break, or leave out in the rain so much that I loved.
Garrison Keillor
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Nothing you do for children is ever wasted.
Garrison Keillor
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I hear a little firecracker go off when you come up with a good rhyme.
Garrison Keillor
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Where I come from, when a Catholic marries a Lutheran it is considered the first step on the road to Minneapolis.
Garrison Keillor
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Men peak at age nineteen and go downhill.
Garrison Keillor
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Eating a little was like vomiting a little, just as bad as a lot.
Garrison Keillor
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Love has the power to rescue us and not let go, otherwise it isn't love
Garrison Keillor
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Take care of your friends. Because there will come a time when you'll be no good to anyone, and the only reason for people to talk to you will be sheer habit.
Garrison Keillor
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It's confidence it has to be something good about getting old. One of the things is that you just don't stress about some stuff that made you so worried.
Garrison Keillor
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I loved feeling special. I hated feeling special.
Garrison Keillor
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I hiked around town, the air sweet and dry, and was sort of overwhelmed by the perfection of it -- the old courthouse, the train depot, Mount [Jumbo] and Mount Sentinel rising up, the neon bars, the funky festivity of a college town .
Garrison Keillor
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The reason to retire is to try to avoid embarrassment you ought to do it before people are dropping big hints. You want to be the first to come up with the idea. You don't want to wait until you trip and fall off the stage.
Garrison Keillor
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A child can educate just about anybody.
Garrison Keillor
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Beauty isn't worth thinking about what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor
Garrison Keillor
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Easter is so disappointing. You suffer all the way through lent, and what do you get for it? A ham.
Garrison Keillor
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You don't want to get that sort of sound in your writing that boing that gives you away.
Garrison Keillor
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A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it.
Garrison Keillor
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Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesnt kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
Garrison Keillor