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I have no talent when it comes to pianos or guitars or any of that, even karaoke. For karaoke, I have to be wasted to get up there and sing.

Gabriel Iglesias

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Gabriel Iglesias
Age: 48
Born: 1976
Born: July 15
Actor
Comedian
Comic
Dancer
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
San Diego
California
Gabriel Jesus Iglecias
Fluffy
Comes
Pianos
Even
Karaoke
Guitars
Wasted
Piano
Sing
Guitar
Talent

More quotes by Gabriel Iglesias

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People understand when I talk about my son not listening, or issues at home or his real dad coming back into the picture, or even stories about family members not seeing eye to eye with what you're doing.
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I'm always ready for TV. I don't have to edit my jokes - when you work clean, you can work anywhere.
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Originally the big argument was that they wanted to call it raw and uncut and I told them I had a problem with that. When you say raw it implies that my show is dirty and that's not the case.
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If I speak Spanish in my show, which sometimes I do, I translate what I say. I make it where I can still be myself, but I make it to where everybody knows what the hell is going on and when everyone leaves, they're like OK, I get it.
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I talked about the stuff so openly that people are able to connect and relate. I put everything out there [into the network], and if I'm having a bad time, people know about it.
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When I go to dance clubs, I always dance with big girls, so we finish at the same time.
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[Making people laugh] was a secret dream I kept and I didn't tell anybody about it until I was about 18.
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The first time I got on stage I was 10 years old and I did impressions. I did cartoon characters and I really got the bug for this life when I saw that people were laughing and saw the attention I was getting.
Gabriel Iglesias
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You can't be bad ass in a car that kills gas like I kill tacos.
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Every night, it's a bakery on the bus. It's a curse, because I talk about how much I love cake, people bring me cake. And now I just found out I'm diabetic, so I'm like, are you kidding me?!
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I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Now people are coming up to meet me at my shows and they're doing my bits! One guy earlier was at 7-11 and he comes up to me and goes you want a falcon?.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I got on the high school speech team and everyday I would get up in front of the class and just start talking.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Being on TV sucks. It's a lot of work. You memorize scripts and then you show up and they change everything. I'm a control freak. When I'm doing stand-up, I say what I want and then I get instant feedback.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I think the furthest I ever got was Guitar Hero. If I could start a band like that, I think I could do it.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I just know you can not be on top forever. There's always going to be the next guy, and if I'm going to go down, I'd like to know I helped the next guy take my spot. You can't prevent the inevitable, but you can join the ship.
Gabriel Iglesias
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If I'm drinking I can either be the nicest guy ever or I'm the guy you should leave alone.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Understand that you don't know it all. You don't know anything yet. What you've been taught is great, but always go with common sense. And don't marry your first love.
Gabriel Iglesias
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If i wouldn't have done comedy, I would have been a teacher. I was really good when I took an exploratory teaching class in high school, at getting kids' attention, and delivering lesson plans. Though my principal even told me that this was what I was meant to do. And that being a big-mouth comedian was a waste of time.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I'm a big fan of Kiss. Gene Simmons, he's all into marketing and branding. You name it, there's some type of product with Kiss' name on it. Studying people like that, you see guys have hooks and there are reasons people are successful.
Gabriel Iglesias