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With all the classes they offer at school, how come they don't have one for common sense?
Gabriel Iglesias
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Gabriel Iglesias
Age: 48
Born: 1976
Born: July 15
Actor
Comedian
Comic
Dancer
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
San Diego
California
Gabriel Jesus Iglecias
Fluffy
Common
Sense
School
Come
Classes
Offer
Offers
Class
More quotes by Gabriel Iglesias
I think the furthest I ever got was Guitar Hero. If I could start a band like that, I think I could do it.
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I did Popeye and Ronald Reagan and everybody was saying things like yeah he's a cute little kid but I started, little by little, telling stories about people I'd met and expanded my voices.
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If I speak Spanish in my show, which sometimes I do, I translate what I say. I make it where I can still be myself, but I make it to where everybody knows what the hell is going on and when everyone leaves, they're like OK, I get it.
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We can choose our family. We can't choose our relatives.
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You gotta hang out with people who have big dreams and believe in that dream.
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Now people are coming up to meet me at my shows and they're doing my bits! One guy earlier was at 7-11 and he comes up to me and goes you want a falcon?.
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My material never comes out verbatim every time. I always tweak in a line, or tweak away a line, gain a couple tags or lose a couple tags. The timing is always off.
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Me racist? The only race I hate is the one you have to run.
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Life is measured by how you lived it, not by the years.
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I got off the plane - I was walking and cooking at the same time.
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When you go to Hawaii, it's all about Aloha. It means hello, goodbye and I love you.
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I know what it's like to have a family and not have insurance and really need it. As a comic, insurance was one of those sacrifices I made early on until I could afford it.
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There's 5 levels of fatness! Fluffy is one of the levels. There's big, healthy, husky, fluffy and damn.
Gabriel Iglesias
Drama is not my passion. If I do it, it's for a check. It's not what I want to do. Comedy's my thing. Stand up's my thing. Everything that comes from that is frosting on the cake.
Gabriel Iglesias
Some comics don't like it when people talk during the set, and it does get a little bit annoying after awhile, but I basically let people dictate what jokes I'm going to do.
Gabriel Iglesias
I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.
Gabriel Iglesias
People understand when I talk about my son not listening, or issues at home or his real dad coming back into the picture, or even stories about family members not seeing eye to eye with what you're doing.
Gabriel Iglesias
Sometimes [high school speech team] was funny, other times it was just talking, but it gave me the confidence to speak in front of people after doing that for a whole year.
Gabriel Iglesias
Hanging out with comics, all they did was make fun of me.
Gabriel Iglesias
Wearing a Hawaiian shirt, you don't ever come across as offensive. Nobody sees you as a threat. You see someone in a Hawaiian shirt, and you are like 'this guy is ready to party.'
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