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I don't even have a clue as to where to find a pregnancy test. I'm looking at all the aisles... they don't have one that says 'oops.

Gabriel Iglesias

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Gabriel Iglesias
Age: 48
Born: 1976
Born: July 15
Actor
Comedian
Comic
Dancer
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
San Diego
California
Gabriel Jesus Iglecias
Fluffy
Says
Looking
Oops
Find
Aisles
Even
Aisle
Clue
Pregnancy
Test
Tests

More quotes by Gabriel Iglesias

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Comedians do movies and TV so that when they tour, they sell out. That's the goal: To get popular enough so the place is packed.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I did Popeye and Ronald Reagan and everybody was saying things like yeah he's a cute little kid but I started, little by little, telling stories about people I'd met and expanded my voices.
Gabriel Iglesias
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TV and film for me are not as exciting as the live stand-up show and getting the immediate reaction of the crowd. TV is a lot of hurry up and wait for your shot and less immediate reaction from people.
Gabriel Iglesias
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When you're a comedian, the Holy Grail is an hour long HBO special.
Gabriel Iglesias
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As a comedian, especially one that works as much as I do, there is a lot of sacrifice. People don't see that I'm away from my family 46 weeks out of the year. I miss all the birthdays and anniversaries and holidays.
Gabriel Iglesias
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[Making people laugh] was a secret dream I kept and I didn't tell anybody about it until I was about 18.
Gabriel Iglesias
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The Ford Flex is a really, really cool car. You get inside and you have so much headroom and it's really comfortable to drive and it's real techy inside. You look at the screen and it's blue and you've got all kinds of controls. Everything is digital.
Gabriel Iglesias
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When you go to Hawaii, it's all about Aloha. It means hello, goodbye and I love you.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I see a lot of nice hotels, but I never really get to enjoy the cities, because I have to be on a plane the next day.
Gabriel Iglesias
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For about three years I was performing at one bar in East Los Angeles that was like a mean dive bar. You're in there performing for drunks or bikers, not the most flattering people. I think it helped build my confidence, because you have to get their attention, then make them laugh.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I talked about the stuff so openly that people are able to connect and relate. I put everything out there [into the network], and if I'm having a bad time, people know about it.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Originally the big argument was that they wanted to call it raw and uncut and I told them I had a problem with that. When you say raw it implies that my show is dirty and that's not the case.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I'm always very happy to talk to people. I relate to people, and the guy on stage is very much the guy that's off stage. People know when it's fake.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I have always been told that I was a funny, entertaining person and have always been told to give comedy a try.
Gabriel Iglesias
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You know, a lot of people think that just 'cause you work out, lift weights, eat right, and do what people tell you to do that you'll live a long live, maybe you will. But, why do people measure life by the years instead about how good the years were.
Gabriel Iglesias
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If I'm drinking I can either be the nicest guy ever or I'm the guy you should leave alone.
Gabriel Iglesias
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My material never comes out verbatim every time. I always tweak in a line, or tweak away a line, gain a couple tags or lose a couple tags. The timing is always off.
Gabriel Iglesias
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The first time I got on stage I was 10 years old and I did impressions. I did cartoon characters and I really got the bug for this life when I saw that people were laughing and saw the attention I was getting.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Well, like I said, there's no reason everyone can't have a piece of the pie, even if there's a gordo there eating most of it.
Gabriel Iglesias
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I'm a big guy, but I'm really simple with the food. I'll hit the In-N-Out or just the regular buffets.
Gabriel Iglesias