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You can't be bad ass in a car that kills gas like I kill tacos.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Gabriel Iglesias
Age: 48
Born: 1976
Born: July 15
Actor
Comedian
Comic
Dancer
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
San Diego
California
Gabriel Jesus Iglecias
Fluffy
Car
Kill
Like
Tacos
Kills
Gas
Ass
More quotes by Gabriel Iglesias
I just know you can not be on top forever. There's always going to be the next guy, and if I'm going to go down, I'd like to know I helped the next guy take my spot. You can't prevent the inevitable, but you can join the ship.
Gabriel Iglesias
I was very dirty I was a very dirty comic. There was no way I would have gotten on TV with the act I had when I first started.
Gabriel Iglesias
Originally the big argument was that they wanted to call it raw and uncut and I told them I had a problem with that. When you say raw it implies that my show is dirty and that's not the case.
Gabriel Iglesias
People understand when I talk about my son not listening, or issues at home or his real dad coming back into the picture, or even stories about family members not seeing eye to eye with what you're doing.
Gabriel Iglesias
Being on TV sucks. It's a lot of work. You memorize scripts and then you show up and they change everything. I'm a control freak. When I'm doing stand-up, I say what I want and then I get instant feedback.
Gabriel Iglesias
We can choose our family. We can't choose our relatives.
Gabriel Iglesias
[Making people laugh] was a secret dream I kept and I didn't tell anybody about it until I was about 18.
Gabriel Iglesias
When you go to Hawaii, it's all about Aloha. It means hello, goodbye and I love you.
Gabriel Iglesias
You live by the cake, you die by the cake.
Gabriel Iglesias
If I'm drinking I can either be the nicest guy ever or I'm the guy you should leave alone.
Gabriel Iglesias
I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.
Gabriel Iglesias
Believe it or not, I've got a really bad metabolism. One burger and I'm done. I'm not a guy that puts away 10 burgers.
Gabriel Iglesias
Comedians do movies and TV so that when they tour, they sell out. That's the goal: To get popular enough so the place is packed.
Gabriel Iglesias
My material never comes out verbatim every time. I always tweak in a line, or tweak away a line, gain a couple tags or lose a couple tags. The timing is always off.
Gabriel Iglesias
If you surround yourself with a bunch of guys who no mas se quieren puro pari and are like, Aaah, let's go get some chicks. Guess what? That's going to slow you down and keep your head somewhere else.
Gabriel Iglesias
I'm never home. I miss birthdays. I miss holidays. I miss anniversaries. I miss special moments. I'm not always there for important times, because I'm out on the road trying to make people laugh. I give up my privacy. I give up the ability to walk somewhere and relax.
Gabriel Iglesias
If I speak Spanish in my show, which sometimes I do, I translate what I say. I make it where I can still be myself, but I make it to where everybody knows what the hell is going on and when everyone leaves, they're like OK, I get it.
Gabriel Iglesias
Now people are coming up to meet me at my shows and they're doing my bits! One guy earlier was at 7-11 and he comes up to me and goes you want a falcon?.
Gabriel Iglesias
I know what it's like to have a family and not have insurance and really need it. As a comic, insurance was one of those sacrifices I made early on until I could afford it.
Gabriel Iglesias
I almost bought a DeLorean the other day just because. If I see something that I think is cool and I like it, I'll go for it.
Gabriel Iglesias
