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My material never comes out verbatim every time. I always tweak in a line, or tweak away a line, gain a couple tags or lose a couple tags. The timing is always off.
Gabriel Iglesias
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Gabriel Iglesias
Age: 48
Born: 1976
Born: July 15
Actor
Comedian
Comic
Dancer
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
San Diego
California
Gabriel Jesus Iglecias
Fluffy
Away
Material
Every
Materials
Verbatim
Always
Line
Tags
Never
Couple
Tweak
Time
Lose
Tag
Loses
Timing
Lines
Gain
Comes
Gains
More quotes by Gabriel Iglesias
As a comedian, especially one that works as much as I do, there is a lot of sacrifice. People don't see that I'm away from my family 46 weeks out of the year. I miss all the birthdays and anniversaries and holidays.
Gabriel Iglesias
Drama is not my passion. If I do it, it's for a check. It's not what I want to do. Comedy's my thing. Stand up's my thing. Everything that comes from that is frosting on the cake.
Gabriel Iglesias
You live by the cake, you die by the cake.
Gabriel Iglesias
I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.
Gabriel Iglesias
I don't even have a clue as to where to find a pregnancy test. I'm looking at all the aisles... they don't have one that says 'oops.
Gabriel Iglesias
When I go to dance clubs, I always dance with big girls, so we finish at the same time.
Gabriel Iglesias
My favorite people to have fun with are police officers 'cause they're so serious, you know.
Gabriel Iglesias
Home in bed listening to the rain getting ready to order a pizza. Sounds like a song til the last part.
Gabriel Iglesias
I never go perform somewhere alone. I've done that since day one. I've always taken other comics with me.
Gabriel Iglesias
The only way I will do a sitcom is if it's hurled at me, and I don't have to work for it.
Gabriel Iglesias
You know what I learned about Hawaiians? They're just blown up Mexicans!
Gabriel Iglesias
I was very dirty I was a very dirty comic. There was no way I would have gotten on TV with the act I had when I first started.
Gabriel Iglesias
If i wouldn't have done comedy, I would have been a teacher. I was really good when I took an exploratory teaching class in high school, at getting kids' attention, and delivering lesson plans. Though my principal even told me that this was what I was meant to do. And that being a big-mouth comedian was a waste of time.
Gabriel Iglesias
Originally the big argument was that they wanted to call it raw and uncut and I told them I had a problem with that. When you say raw it implies that my show is dirty and that's not the case.
Gabriel Iglesias
TV and film for me are not as exciting as the live stand-up show and getting the immediate reaction of the crowd. TV is a lot of hurry up and wait for your shot and less immediate reaction from people.
Gabriel Iglesias
If you surround yourself with a bunch of guys who no mas se quieren puro pari and are like, Aaah, let's go get some chicks. Guess what? That's going to slow you down and keep your head somewhere else.
Gabriel Iglesias
As far as uncut I think we all know that you guys cut up the special. Originally it was going to be 2 hours plus and it got chopped down so I said we can't use those words because it's not going to represent me right.
Gabriel Iglesias
I got off the plane - I was walking and cooking at the same time.
Gabriel Iglesias
Hanging out with comics, all they did was make fun of me.
Gabriel Iglesias
I drink diet coke so I can eat regular cake.
Gabriel Iglesias
