Quote

The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.

Fred Allen

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
President
Executive
Form
Executives
Would
Vice
Fungus
Boat
Barnacles
Vices
Attaches
Average
Fungi
Growth
Desk
Called
Desks

More quotes by Fred Allen

Image
The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.
Fred Allen
Image
The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion.
Fred Allen
Image
My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
Fred Allen
Image
Television is the triumph of machine over people.
Fred Allen
Image
Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.
Fred Allen
Image
Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.
Fred Allen
Image
When Jack Benny plays the violin, it sounds as though the strings are still in the cat.
Fred Allen
Image
An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.
Fred Allen
Image
You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
Fred Allen
Image
Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
Fred Allen
Image
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
Fred Allen
Image
If the grass is greener in the other fellow's yard- let him worry about cutting it.
Fred Allen
Image
A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
Fred Allen
Image
A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
Fred Allen
Image
Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.
Fred Allen
Image
California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Fred Allen
Image
An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
Fred Allen
Image
Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.
Fred Allen
Image
He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.
Fred Allen
Image
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
Fred Allen