Quote

When Jack Benny plays the violin, it sounds as though the strings are still in the cat.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Though
Sound
Benny
Stills
Violin
Still
Jack
Music
Strings
Play
Plays
Cat
Sounds

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The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi.
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Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.
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I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man.
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We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
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An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
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A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.
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California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
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Hush, little bright line, don’t you cry You’ll be a cliché by and by.
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My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
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My agent gets 10 percent of everything I get, except the blinding headaches.
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He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.
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All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.
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During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk today we have small men enjoying big talk.
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If the grass is greener in the other fellow's yard- let him worry about cutting it.
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It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.
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Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.
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Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you'll end up in the police station.
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Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
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English coffee tastes like water that has been squeezed out of a wet sleeve.
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