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Radio is called a medium because it is rare that anything is well done.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Called
Anything
Wells
Well
Done
Medium
Mediums
Rare
Radio

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He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.
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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
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Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.
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A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.
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In show business, more showgirls are kept than promises.
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The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury liners.
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Father Time is the make-up man responsible for the physical changes that determine the parts the average actor is to play.
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My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
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He always had a chip on his shoulder that he was ready to use to kindle an argument.
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With the advance of refrigeration, I hope that along with the frozen foods someday we will have frozen conversation. A person will be able to keep a frozen promise indefinitely.
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The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi.
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Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
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Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you'll end up in the police station.
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Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.
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A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.
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The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think- Ladies' Home JournalI'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four
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If the grass is greener in the other fellow's yard- let him worry about cutting it.
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I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.
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You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
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Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
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