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A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Skin
Skins
Story
Around
Stories
Human
Humans
Nothing

More quotes by Fred Allen

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We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
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A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.
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If the grass is greener in the other fellow's yard- let him worry about cutting it.
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My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
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He always had a chip on his shoulder that he was ready to use to kindle an argument.
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Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
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I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.
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In show business, more showgirls are kept than promises.
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When Jack Benny plays the violin, it sounds as though the strings are still in the cat.
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My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.
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I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
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Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything.
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Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.
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The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury liners.
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Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
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Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.
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Television is a triumph of equipment over people.
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He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.
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All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.
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It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.
Fred Allen