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It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Joy
Goes
Happiness
Spreads
Funny
Suppress
Inspirational
Hips
Back
Spread
Laughter
Laughing

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A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 PM to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished before lunch.
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Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.
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I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man.
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In show business, more showgirls are kept than promises.
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With the advance of refrigeration, I hope that along with the frozen foods someday we will have frozen conversation. A person will be able to keep a frozen promise indefinitely.
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Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything.
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A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
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A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
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All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.
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Everywhere outside New York City is Bridgeport, Connecticut.
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Radio is called a medium because it is rare that anything is well done.
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When Jack Benny plays the violin, it sounds as though the strings are still in the cat.
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Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.
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Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.
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The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think- Ladies' Home JournalI'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four
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The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.
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There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.
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We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
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What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
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The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.
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