Quote

He always had a chip on his shoulder that he was ready to use to kindle an argument.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Shoulder
Shoulders
Anger
Argument
Ready
Kindle
Use
Kindles
Always
Chip
Chips

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Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
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I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man.
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Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.
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A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
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An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.
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An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
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Hollywood is a great place if you're an orange.
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Father Time is the make-up man responsible for the physical changes that determine the parts the average actor is to play.
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There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.
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On ships they call them barnacles in business they attach themselves to desks and are called vice presidents.
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Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
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When Jack Benny plays the violin, it sounds as though the strings are still in the cat.
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Television is a triumph of equipment over people.
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A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
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Television is the triumph of machine over people.
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We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
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A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 PM to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished before lunch.
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All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.
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An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
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The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion.
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