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Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
Fred Allen
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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Asks
Autographs
Church
Recognize
Funny
Wear
Might
Pride
Even
Afraid
Humor
Movie
Stars
Sunglasses
More quotes by Fred Allen
Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.
Fred Allen
We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
Fred Allen
The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.
Fred Allen
Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.
Fred Allen
Television is the triumph of machine over people.
Fred Allen
California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Fred Allen
He's so small, he's a waste of skin.
Fred Allen
Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
Fred Allen
During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk today we have small men enjoying big talk.
Fred Allen
A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.
Fred Allen
An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
Fred Allen
The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi.
Fred Allen
The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.
Fred Allen
In show business, more showgirls are kept than promises.
Fred Allen
Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.
Fred Allen
Father Time is the make-up man responsible for the physical changes that determine the parts the average actor is to play.
Fred Allen
Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great.
Fred Allen
A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.
Fred Allen
You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.
Fred Allen
Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.
Fred Allen