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During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk today we have small men enjoying big talk.

Fred Allen

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Fred Allen
Age: 61 †
Born: 1894
Born: May 31
Died: 1956
Died: March 17
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Cambridge
Massachusetts
John Florence Sullivan
Men
Humor
Days
Small
Talk
Funny
Enjoy
Samuel
Bigs
Johnson
Today
Enjoying

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A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 PM to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished before lunch.
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The average vice-president is a form of executive fungus that attaches itself to a desk. On a boat this growth would be called a barnacle.
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A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.
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A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.
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Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you'll end up in the police station.
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Father Time is the make-up man responsible for the physical changes that determine the parts the average actor is to play.
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We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
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Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
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The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi.
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The S.S. Sierra was a ten-thousand-ton vessel. Today, lifeboats bigger than the Sierra are found on the Queen Mary and other luxury liners.
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Hush, little bright line, don’t you cry You’ll be a cliché by and by.
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The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.
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What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
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With the advance of refrigeration, I hope that along with the frozen foods someday we will have frozen conversation. A person will be able to keep a frozen promise indefinitely.
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Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.
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Television is a triumph of equipment over people.
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Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
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Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything.
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The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think- Ladies' Home JournalI'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four
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My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.
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